Relationships are like the ice cream in a banana split and the cherry on top. What is a banana split without the ice cream and the cherry? How happy would you be with just a banana and some chocolate fudge? It would still be yummy, but ice cream and a cherry make it even better. The fact is relationships are important. You can have all of the abundance and health but still be unhappy if you don't have fulfilling relationships. It's one of those key aspects of living our best life. That's how I view a significant other relationship. So no wonder we all wanna know the deets on manifesting love.
The Law of Attraction gets us there with a few simple steps. Since the key to manifesting what we want is mainly in focusing on it and feeling good at the same time, the steps you need to take are all about that. If you aren't quite sure about how to manifest what you want, I recommend you read through my post on that. It will make things much clearer for you and make the practices I talk about here more understandable and effective. Manifesting a fulfilling relationship with “the one” starts with just a few simple things:
- Make a list
- Stop the pressure to find the one
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I can't stress enough how important it is to write down the qualities of a partner you are looking for and be as specific as you can. My personal list is like 4 or 5 pages long now, and I know I can add a lot more to it. When I add something to my list I always read through it first because it gets the feeling good ball rolling (and I can see if I've already written it down before I record it twice).
Being specific about what you want is beneficial because the longer the list you have, the more you have to focus on that feels good. The key to manifesting what you want is in how you feel, more specifically, feeling good. If you have pages and pages of how you would love your partner to be, that's pages and pages of thoughts to focus on and feel happy while doing it.
I wouldn't stop at physical traits or general personality traits like I want them to be a nice person or funny or have dark hair and green eyes. I would try to delve into how you want them to be funny. For example, if you love nerdy humor, write that. If you love someone who is mindful of how they make you feel, write that instead of just, caring (but write caring to and then get more specific). Start with general and then try to get more specific.
You can expand your list to include:
- Physical traits of your partner
- General personality traits of your partner
- How you want them to treat you
- How you'd want your partner to react in specific situations
- How you'd want your partner to act with specific people, like children
- Anything you can think of, add it
The fact is that your life experience and past experiences with partners has created specific clarification about what you want in a relationship. Your list is going to be unique to your experiences and what they've taught you about what you want. We often learn what we want through experiencing what we don't want, which is ok. You are the creator of your reality and that includes the people you attract. When you focus on what you want, you make room for that, and repel its opposite.
Do you want someone with a carefree, happy, personality or do you want that Debbie downer? The difference comes with focus. A list keeps you focused on what it is you want rather than what you don't want.
The reality is that it's not always easy to be entirely positively focused when we aren't use to it. It takes practice, so it's possible you'll attract people who don't quite fit the list. Sometimes it's easy to meet someone and want them to be the one for us so badly that we overlook some of the red flags. Reviewing your list can help you vet new partners and determine whether they are showing signs of being the opposite of what you desire. Only you know yourself and what is important enough to make allowances or not for. Having a list can help you move on quicker when someone isn't quite cutting it.
Once you've got your list going you should spend time visualizing your new relationship. Visualizing is about using your imagination to see yourself in situations with a person who is and acts in ways you prefer. Like how you can see the scene playing from a movie you watch, you create your own movie.
For example, if kindness is important, imagine yourself on a date. Walking out of a restaurant, you come across someone who asks you for change. Instead of getting angry, or just ignoring that person, your date gives them money like it was no big deal. Feel happy when you visualize, too. When visualizing, the key is to focus on how you feel.
What you think about, feel, and expect, even about other people, you get. When you visualize you are attracting what you want and how it feels. If you have a lot of negative feelings about SO relationships visualization can help with it. As you focus on what you want and feel good, you stop the flow of negative energy.
When we become obsessed with finding the one, it's a problem if we are always noticing what we don't have. It's not beneficial because our creative power comes from what we choose to think about and how we feel about it. In a focus on what we don't want, then, we create more of that. If you have a hard time not focusing on the lack of a relationship or often feel bad about it then in those moments you need to put your attention elsewhere. Think about something else until you can get yourself in a good feeling place and then go back to your list and use visualization.
Here's the thing. You can manifest the perfect partner for you, who fits into all aspects of your list, right now. However, as time goes by your list can change because of your experience. Relationships, both significant other and in general, help us clarify what we want. Sometimes you might be ok with something now and later change your mind. It helps to make peace with the process. I think if you stay focused on why you want a relationship and how that feels ‐ which is to be happy, then a person who is easy to be happy with is always going to be there, whether it's always the same person' or not.